Today is a “Nana day,” meaning that Nana (or, “my mom” as I used to call her before I had a kid and took the final steps into crazy,) comes to stay with Jr. during the day while I tootle off to work with no day care drop off drama required.
Awesomeness for Jr, for Nana, and for Momma too.
It is a beautiful Colorful Colorado day, so there I am in the Keri-mobile, sunroof open, oversized shades on, chug-a-lugging a Mickey-D’s coffee and doing a duet with the Jason Aldean song on the radio.
When suddenly I see it. The discarded 7/11-style nacho container in the middle of my lane. I am going too fast to avoid it – the lane next to me is full of a big UPS truck. Nothing can prevent the tragedy.
I clip it with one wheel, sending it flying through the air, an arc of leftover cheese sauce shooting out from behind it as it takes one gooey hop off my windshield and blows off down the road behind me.
I am shaken as I squirt my windshield, trying in vain to budge the orange smudges from my line of sight. I pull into a gas station with a car wash and get out to survey the aftermath of the collision – it isn’t pretty.
Blobs of old, bright orange 7/11 cheese, mixed jalapeno slices and what I *think* were minced onions covered the front and one side of the Keri-mobile. I gasped as a blob dripped off the front fender on to the ground with a plop.
It took two trips through the car wash to fully remove all of the goo, with some shameless misuse of the window cleaning scrubby thing in between trips. Something tells me that for a few weeks to come, if you are driving behind me on a hot day you might smell a hint of jalapeno wafting through your window.
Oh Liquid Cheese – HOW COULD YOU!?
I kind of want nachos for lunch, just to show it who is REALLY boss around here.